a low budget telethon

Tonight I had the privilege of seeing Neil Gaiman speak at Agnes Scott College, courtesy of Little Shop of Stories in Decatur, Georgia. I originally had a ticket for the overflow room but last minute, a group of overflow ticket holders were able to grab seats in the balcony of the auditorium.  I incidentally managed to end up sitting next to my children’s lit professor, entirely appropriate given that Mr. Gaiman was here because a children’s bookstore one a contest based on The Graveyard Book.

To say the least, I was utterly charmed — not only by his animated readings from two of his books (the first few chapters of Odd and the Frost Giants as well as a selection from The Graveyard Book) nor the ease with which he spoke, but by his anecdotes about writing.  He recounted how he came up with the idea for The Graveyard Book: he had this exciting idea but upon writing the first scene, he would deem that he wasn’t good enough to write the story yet. He’d put it aside and try again years later, then put it away again.  Eventually, he figured he’d never be good enough but what did it matter? As I’m trying to find my writing voice, it was not only common sense but great to hear or be reminded.

Admittedly, I have only read samplings of Sandman but I love Marvel 1602 and am in the process of reading Good Omens.  Hearing him read the dialogue of his characters makes me want to tear through boxes of packed books so I could pour over the speech bubbles.  I want to read all his children and YA books before I even step foot into his adult work.  Since taking that course last semester, I’ve embraced novels for younger audiences.  Books with the whimsical or fantastical (in addition to Gaiman’s style, I’m thinking particularly of DiCamillo’s The Tale of Despereaux or Selznick’s The Invention of Hugo Cabret) make my heart swell. I wish there were more books like this when I was younger but I also feel that I appreciate them on a different level now that I’m older.  While I build my own library and indulge in these books, I seriously cannot wait to share them with my hypothetical future children.

It was a wonderful and inspiring way to spend a foggy evening.

Ed Helms and I have something in common: we both had a baby tooth into our adulthood (well, and we were both born in Atlanta — but details, people). While he got an implant at 16, mine fell out naturally at 25 (and from further inspection, it looks like we were even missing the same tooth - one of the front teeth, easily visible).

My tooth finally gave up its long life in April of this year.  My mom made a comment that the poor thing couldn’t hang on any longer but than retracted it, because technically it was supposed to have fallen out when I was a child.  If anything, it was the little tooth that could.  We knew it was coming but until earlier this year, it was pretty sturdy. I just didn’t imagine it would disintegrate so quickly.

There is the issue of self-appearance.  Dreams of teeth falling out are common among people who are concerned about how they appear in certain situations (a job interview, for instance).  My tooth had threatened to fall out during an interview I had in D.C. and luckily held off to the evening after the interview itself.  Prior to my interview, I was haunted by visions of the rest of my teeth crumbling or spitting out of my gums.

I was extremely self-conscious about the fact I was missing a tooth.  The vacancy was visible whenever I smiled — and I love to smile. Imagine not being able to be able to laugh or smile easily because you suddenly remember you’re missing teeth that you’ve had only months earlier? A year after graduating college? When you’re actively searching for a job?

It was embarrassing.

The biggest issue (other than my pride) was money. I am uninsured, even with a well-paying job.  At our small company, we do not receive benefits like health insurance.* The entire procedure is $3,725 (which includes a three-tooth bridge and the extraction of the root left behind after my tooth fell out).  In savings, I had $2,100 set aside for self-employment taxes (from the time when I was a contract employee). Already accustomed to not having money, I transferred the money and worked out a finance plan with $2,100 up front and $500/mo for the next three months (after which I can put $500/mo back into my savings in preparation for tax season). Luckily, I can have this whole thing written off as a tax deduction and only have $1,125 left on my balance.

Realizing I could get it done this month, I talked to my dentist and had an appointment for the following morning at 9 AM. A little more than a week after having my temporary bridge in place, my permanent bridge was ready.  I had the temporary bridge removed and the permanent one temporarily cemented in (to see how my gums heal around the bridge first).  We’ll revisit it during my next cleaning in 5-6 months and hopefully, if things have gone well, we’ll be able to attach it permanently.

Really, I’m just excited to have teeth for my travels, a wedding in which I’m a bridesmaid, and the holidays.

*Don’t worry - I’ve been researching purchasing individual health insurance for a little while. Still, dental coverage will continue to be a luxury.

My head’s been floating around with financial aid numbers lately — I helped my brother (and my mom) figure out his financial aid situation. My mother referred to me as her secret weapon in that fight.  It was like that, too, when I had to give my brother advice or answer random questions whenever they filled out FAFSA. I had gone through that whole process, primarily on my own because my parents were less than fluent in applying for financial aid.  It got me thinking about my own experience — which I am very currently having to face and manage.

I’ve begun the horrifying process of consolidating my student loans. Now? At 25? I know. I’ve been able to put this off — by attending school full time during my post-baccalaureate program, my loans do not go into repayment until November 2009 (with the exception of one federal one). When I took time off from school, I had begun repaying my Stafford loans some and consolidated one for a lower interest rate.  Since then, they’ve been in the grace period, patiently growing as they were waiting to ambush me.  For the longest time, I did not want to see the balance — especially of all my student debt combined.  The mere idea of it stressed me out.  I knew they weren’t in repayment and therefore I could pretend they didn’t exist, except that nagging feeling in the back of my skull.

However, since landing in a comfortable job (accidentally, even — after a year of unsuccessful searching on my own), I’ve been slowly coming to terms with my financial responsibilities. It seems less scary now that I actually have the means to pay it off.  I’ve already gotten used to immediately paying that amount of money by applying a huge lump sum to my credit card (with hopes and semi-plans — barring emergencies — to pay it off completely by Spring 2010).

So far the process has consisted purely of research and obtaining my credit reports in preparation of this fight.  My boyfriend’s parents emailed me with some advice about consolidating my private loans and I’m trying to decide if I should refinance my Stafford loans before or after applying for private loan consolidation. I’ve decided on a lender for my private loan consolidation after reading plenty of information and am now making a game plan of when I should apply for the consolidation.

My parents and my boss have asked me (sometimes numerously) if it was worth it and without hesitation, I say yes.  Y’all who know me personally would know more about my journey through college and all those hardships (mental more than financial) and I do not think I would have gained the amount of positive experience anywhere else.

I just tune out when my mom starts singing about the fact that I will be making mortgage-esque payments.

I think I realized my attitude toward blogging is that it has to be a mini-essay or anything that is a nice, neat package. When did this happen? When did I stop wanting to write random, short tidbits about my day? I think I’m going to begin again, to get the blog juices flowing. I hope you’re prepared.

I spent the majority of the Memorial Day weekend camping at the Broad River Outpost in Danielsville, Georgia. It mostly consisted of drinking cheap beer, playing card games or Scrabble, and eating s’mores and hot dogs. Looking back, I wish I had broken out th camera but between hanging out in the river and the overcast/rain, it is probably for the best.

Friday, Chantal, Amy, and I headed out to meet a few boys. Saturday morning, our numbers doubled to twelve in anticipation of kayaking. Amy, Lindsay, and I opted out in favor of sitting on the sand bar and rocks in the river and drinking PBR. When it rained on Saturday night, a group of us piled into one of the tents to play card games with drinks on the line. As a result, it was especially hard waking up Sunday morning to break down camp and head back to Atlanta.

Since then, I’ve been working in web development and working on driving with Anna. A previous roommate, Becky, came into town and we all went out to Milton’s Cuisine & Cocktails in Alpharetta.

But now that it’s the weekend and I’m not going into the office, I’m being lazy at home with light cleaning and laundry.

I originally graduated from Agnes Scott College in May 2008 (B.A. Classical Civilization and Religious Studies), the summer after which I scoured the job market for a well-meaning job (something in non-profit or AmeriCorps). When nothing panned out, I took advantage of my undergraduate institution’s post-baccalaureate program, Year 5. The program is unique in the sense that it offers recent graduates the opportunity to take up to a year-load of courses tuition-free (except some pesky mandatory fees). Though I will reflect on my educational experiences some, this blog will mostly focus on my aspirations and frustrations with living after college.

Currently, I am freelancing as a web developer as I search, apply, and interview for teaching positions at private high schools across the southern United States. I intend to go back to school (eventually) for a Masters in Education. In the meantime, I want to explore and make a fool of myself while I still have a chance.